Well folks, that’s all she wrote. Or is it, he? This whole P.C. gender equality bull shit is becoming monotonous. Anyway, rest easy WNBA fans; your team’s future has arrived. Every year there is constant speculation and anticipation of who will go where in the WNBA Draft. Of course there’s sure to be a trade to shake things up, after all what type of WNBA Draft would it be with out some movers and shakers. So let’s look back at what will surely be remembered as one of the WNBA’s drafts.
In a surprise move to almost no one, Brianna Stewart from UCONN went #1. What was surprising, however, is how good she looked. I know what you’re thinking, “but Colby, any girl can look good with make up on.” And to that I would reply by showing you this picture: Terrifying, I know. Compare that to how she looked tonight, and wow the difference is undeniable.
Granted, perhaps she shows too much gum when she smiles. And yes, she should have just let her hair flow down both sides of those broad shoulders. But this girl, the one very few saw tonight, is a solid 7.8-8.1 and if we’re grading on a curve she gets a 9.4. I am of course assuming that there are no really hot prospects like that chick from Notre Dame a few years back.
Now, much like every other WNBA event, I’m assuming the draft wasn’t aired on TV. But judging by the pictures, Stewart was preparing for the influx of gold diggers looking to cash in on her, potentially, millions few hundred thousand dollars she might make as a pro. Now, don’t get me wrong, Stewart is by no means “hot”. She is, however a beast on the court and surely a genetic jackpot. So while her career may not mean $$$ our potential love child’s might. When asked how she felt on being drafted first overall Stewart answered, “It’s exciting to know that I was considered the best at what I do, but at the same time I’m a little disappointed that no one will really care about my career anymore. I kind of wish I could just stay in college so at least I’ll get coverage when we win the Championship.”
Stewart’s teammates were the next two picks, further validating that they only female basketball players that matter play for UCONN. These two will undoubtedly play for their teams next year, what isn’t clear is if anyone even remembers their names at this point.
And of course, you have the rest of the picks. Wonderful girls! All of which have been exemplary role models to young girls in their community and been outstanding members of their respective colleges.
If there is one thing to take away from this years draft, it would be this. It came(unbeknownst to anyone), It was seen(by very few), and it conquered the headlines(until ESPN could finish their post about the release of the NFL schedule). The WNBA Draft, ever reminding us that women have “a league of their own”.